The room got very quiet. Laney's smile — I watched it — started to flicker. I said, "Laney has been having an affair for seven months. His name is Caleb. He works with her. Brandon — I am so sorry you are hearing this right now. I debated this for a long time. But I could not sit here another year and watch this table celebrate a version of my best friend that isn't real." I set my glass down. I said, "Happy birthday, Laney." And I sat. The silence at that table was the longest silence of my life. Brandon did not move. Laney did not move. Marlene, across the table, was staring at her plate like she could set it on fire with her attention. Someone down the table coughed. Someone else said "Oh my God" in a whisper. Brandon finally — finally — stood up. He walked out of the restaurant without speaking. He did not look at Laney. Laney sat in her chair, for a moment, looking at me across the table with an expression I had never seen her make before. And then she stood up and she walked out too. The other thirty-eight people sat at the table. Nobody knew what to do. I picked up my glass. I drank the rest of my wine.